Friday, April 6, 2012

i haven't a clue, so we'll just say...

Frustration that comes with stress is telling of how well a person can take on the ability to actually walk tall, stand strong and live well.  Did that make sense?  Every time "something" happens to me, I have this conversation with myself regarding my right to grief or if I am worthy of solice for that moment.  Taking everything you are taught as a kid, and applying it as an adult will actually work, if we can relinquish our supposed maturity.  We aren't really grown unless we can revert back to the basics of what living really is.  Remember when waking up in the morning and walking to the kitchen table for breakfast was easy?  When getting dressed was not a hassle but something that you looked forward to because you were given the opportunity to actually pick it out?  Nothing has changed.  The only evolving that has taken place in this world is the growth of our egos and the emancipation of our sincerity, that was once very alive, however now hibernating in the emptiness of our once innocence.  I don't know what is worse.  Actually I do, and you do too.  We can't keep guiding the light of self indulgence and basking in the shade of ignorance.  There is nothing bliss about it.  There is something magnificent in my sons eyes when he surrenders to disciple and recognizes that what he has done was wrong.  When he realizes that feeling inside is guilt and acknowledes that emotion as the opportunity for remorse and yearns for reconciliation.  Why do we lose that?  I want to live in those moments.  I want to know that when I look somebody in the eyes and give them a piece of who I really am, my reimbursement will come not because I expect it, but because they too have a desire to share.  That innate gesture we have to be "kid like" is our own psyche requesting an honorable mention.  Let's embrace regression, for it's where I believe we desire to be, and where conquering our best living resides.

No clever segway here, just a few time stoppers into our best living a few weeks ago.  Below is what we've been up to and a type of regression that we always welcome when Adan's involved.
I was d'verginized of this tradition
Waiting patiently and tolerating my "clicks"
Can't say enough
I wonder if, no, probably not 
About 3 months late, but we'll take a Christmas present from Aunt Paige anytime

My sister and brother in law are sick over their kids, and will do just about anything for them, not to mention host some of the funnest parties...lucky for them and lucky for us because we get to go!!!
Maka got Lazer'd away
Adan surrendered nothing but laughs and giggles
Noah got Bowl'ly with it (give 'em a break, it was an action shot)

My new job has given me so much, more than I can really be grateful for, and one of the most amazing gifts has been new friends.  And the good kind too.
Lisa = the frequent use of the "f" bomb
Jennifer = you may know her as Ludacris or JLew
Rachel = kin folk
Brooke = "it's Brookie Bitch"

I'm officially a grown up, at least that is what my mom says.  She couldn't believe that she was actually meeting me at our church to see my sons first school/PE program.  She was in hysterical laughter over it, and between you and I, me too.
He's an entire head taller than his classmates
See what I mean...I am so proud

When we went to Houston a few weeks ago, I was begging Paige to tag along, because it had been years since the four of us had been together, well...last night, we sort of got the chance...
We bluetooth'd Ally from Paige's car last night, is not funny to you, but it sure was to us

Today my Savior was crucified. 
Today was the day that He died for my sins. 
Today I will honor Him as I remember the love that He has for me still. 

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