Friday, March 13, 2015

Seeds...

The alarm ding went off and my heart jumped, it still does, after 12 years with him, excitement ensues at the idea of seeing him. He walks through the garage door and there he stands, surveying his family before walking into the den. I fight every urge to hand him Luca because I know how important this time will be for Adan. No different than any other day, Adan whispers, "tell him I'm invisible", and as I do, he nudges even closer to me, as if hiding will assist his ploy to actually be out of sight. Marcus participates, it's cute, acting as if it is the first time he's ever been asked to play along. He enters the room, falsely surrendering to the find. "Where is Adan," he says, as he continues the persuit. And I can hear Adan giggle, his breathing becomes faster and he starts to pinch me a little as if to let me know, "mom, I'm so good, he has no clue where I am." And I sit back, as an observer of my family, I am in absolute joy at the thought that my husband is not only our son's daddy, but he is also our son's companion, his hero and these silly moments will carry Adan in the future. He will look back at them, as I have so many times before when I think about my daddy and the silly things he did with us to make us smile, and he will carry the love, always. I can't help but think of how truly blessed I am. To have participated in this cycle. I have witnessed many that need to be broken, but this one, this one has a tertiary effect that can only reap goodness, and will be given to Adan so one day he too can be this man for his children. My cup is so full, thank you Lord.

I always carry my camera, it's with me always. And if I had it to do all over again, I would have gone to college for photography and writing. So I blog and take pictures to fill that void, and it serves my soul in a different way. It affords me time alone, with no children and no husband. I am alone, behind the lens or on my computer, out letting my insides in the only artistic way I know. I love it. Sometimes, just sometimes my friends get wind of my desires and ask me to do them a favor, and I oblige and the results are below. 

#newbyginnings Maternity FAVES

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